Journal
Tuesday,Dec 14 2004, 08:56:00 PM
ok so this mornin i got up @ 5:38 exact then went n gotta shower an all that..then left here @ lyke 6:32....checked the anti-freeze n the van n left....yea...so it has a quite lil knocking noise which i've heard b4 and just ignored it....then i get up 2 moto mart and i pulled up n front of the place to turn ma application in an it was knocking a louder....so i turned it off...then went inside....well wen i came back out i tryed 2 start it an it wouldnt start....so i was like s-o-b...n tryed 2 start it a couple tymes nothing so i went back n side an the manger was like when was this turned in...(the app. n i happened 2 b n there n i was like i just brought that in...but may i please use ur phone...n so the manager handed me the phone....called ma dad n he was lyke whats up....me-van wont start im sittin @ motomart....dad-ok ill b there...so i went an sat back n the van...turned the radio on n was lyke fawk man it's cold so turned the van off off an went n stood n side....then dad got there n @ 1st he was like start it well i tryed n he goes the batteries dead cuzz thaz how it sounded...so he was gonna call a wrecked cause its only 6:40am....skewl starts @ 7:35 shyt ima b late......well anyways then he checked the oil.....n he was lyke holy shyt there's none n here....so he bought 3 quarts of oil.....then we put 2 1/2 quarts in and the van started right up....well it hadda loud ass knocking noise....dad being a mechanic for 20yrs was like its gotta bad rod or w/e an prolly sum scratched piston's....then he was like back it up...n we'll call a wrecker...then i was going to an he goes well hell just run it home fast...n so i ran it home hearing clank clank clank....best music ever man from metal....so yea now i have nothing 2 drive 2 skewl.......so ma dad followed me home...also then ran us 2 skewl....n skewl was pretty lame were doing sum research paper n english....math was easy...copyed the shyt right off her desk....lmfao shop 1st hr was fun i got to use the machine n work on ma bearing punch....keyboardin was fun fun lemme tell ya....but yea so....2day was ok and now im gettin fucking tired of this Dial up--netzero shit it suxs ass never get it!!!!!!! ok so i leave u finally with this..........its awesome......
POLISH DIVORCE..
A Polish man married an American girl after he had been in the United
States a year or so; and, although his English was far from perfect, they
got along very well. However, one day he rushed into a lawyer's office
and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him --"very quick." The
lawyer replied that the speed for getting a divorce would depend on the
circumstances. Questions then posed by the lawyer elicited the following
humorous responses.
LAWYER: "Have you any grounds?"
POLE: "Yah, Yah, an acre and half and a nice little home with 3 bedrooms."
LAWYER: "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
POLE: "It is made of concrete, brick, and mortar," he responded.
LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"
POLE: "No," he replied, "we have a two-car carport, and have never
really needed one."
LAWYER: "I mean, What are your relations like?"
POLE: "All my relations are in Poland."
LAWYER: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
POLE: "Yes, we have hi fidelity stereo set and DVD player with surround
sound. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions
is yes."
LAWYER: "No, I mean Does your wife beat you up?"
POLE: "NO, I'm always up before her."
LAWYER: "Is your wife a nagger?"
POLE: "NO, she is a white woman."
LAWYER: "WHY do you want this divorce?"
POLE: "She going to kill me."
LAWYER: "What makes you think that?"
POLE: "I got proof.
LAWYER: "What kind of proof?"
POLE: "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at the drug store and
put on shelf in bathroom. I can read -- it says, 'Polish Remover'."