Dear diary:

Well its about time I wrote what happened.

Its just ive been grounded for that month so I wasn’t able to and also I cant exactly put anything into words, I cant describe what im feeling and im just too upset and hurt by it, I really don’t wanna write it.

But I'll try…not ALL the details.

Its just to come and think of it, I only have one true and good friend although that person is so far away, I still care about her and I care about what she thinks of me.

Anyhow back to what happen, to why I was grounded.

Well, I was planning a surprise bday party to my ex best friend sarah, me and mick cancelled it cause I told him that most ppl r asking me if they can bring alcohol.

So then shortly mick called the next week and told sarah that were making a little party, me, sarah, mick, steven (sarah bf) and ahmad.

So sarah came over which by the way ,I didn’t know about the party until very later on, she told me that she wants to go to the park, so I called my dad to drive us, she her dad talked to mine and blah.

The minute her dad asked for mine, I had a bad feeling about all of this so I called 7alema to come with me.

I was suppose to meet her there but sarah took me somewhere and told me about the party, so she was like ccome on, I really want u to be with me so I went with her and ahmed (he was driving) and steven.

We drove to micks place, we talked a bit and then sarah went with steven and locked the door, I was pissed at that so mick took me upstairs and we played video games, when we came back it past an hours, we found alcohol (turned out a guy named hamad, brought it)

And a girl named dana, and another dude, and three lesbians were making out in the background.

And my friend was still with steven, mick went absolutely crazy, but hamad was drunk, so there as no point, he kicked the girls out but dana stayed, she was also drunk, (following me around, trying to kiss me) weird!

Sarah come out, ahamd goes and makes sure, they didn’t have sex, which they didn’t ,thank the Lord!

U see, we were suppose to be home at 9pm, but when were gonna leave, she got drunk with her bf.

They drank vodka.

She became really crazy, walking around like a mad man, and she drank a lot, I was pulling the bottle from her and she end up throwing it at me, soaking me with alcohol, steven was walking around with a butcher knife, trying to kill ahmed cause he thought that he was fooling around with sarah.

So we tied him up, when I left, I saw sarah out side the house, dragged her inside, she couldn’t walked at all, so yeah -_-

So the whole time, after that happen, with her throwing up, steven woke up,it was jst very stressful.

Her dad was calling her, my dad doesn’t know where im at, probably at the park, looking for me, and it was about 11pm…I had to leave her there and go to the park.

When I went back home, her dad called me and started threatening me of going to the police, and that I kidnapped his daughter cause she was with me, and I couldn’t tell him that she passed out and she half naked in the bath top, while everyone is throwing cold water at her and trying to fucking wake her up!

My dad talked to him, I didn’t tell him the truth, I just told him that he ditched me, and somehow dana got involved into it.

So anyhow when everything ended and she was a bit sober, I told the guys to throw her at her place and let her speak to her dad.

After everything calmed down and I got grounded cause I was late, the bitch goes and tells her dad that I was at the party, and I got drunk and that I MADE her go there, my dad was so angry and the fact that this is a Muslim country and well…it was just full of drama, he didn’t believe me that I didn’t drink.

And well I don’t blame him,there were boys and girls, alone, alcohol, probably dancing was going on and nuthin happened, she just got drunk!!

So yeah but the story didn’t end there as her dad throw a law suit on mine, sarah turned out to have alcohol poisoning and there were checking if she aws a virgin, and her dad is blaming me the whole time. (screaming on the phone, threatening me that hes gonna throw in behind bars)

And my dad isn’t sure to believe me.

Anyhow, after two weeks of the police calling us and making mylife so and very stressful cause is she turned out not to be a virgin, my dad will go to jail, cause she was under my dads custody , and the thing is her dad is saying that my dad was involved in this.

Anyhow imagine, he wouldn’t just go to jail, I might go as well, and all that testing that they did to her, they would do it too, and in here, in Kuwait, there is nuhtin called prisoners' rights, I would’ve been fucked all over.

Its over now though, shes a virgin so the law suite has been dropped.

But im hurt cause my friend back stabbed me and said that I did all of those stuff, and she told them everything, do u have any idea what would have happened to steven and mick?

7 years of poison, but she doesn’t give a fuck!

Ppl at my old skool called me to see if im alright, they told me that she doesn’t care, she was proud and she was showing off that she got drunk and all of those ecatung things happened!!!

When I heard that, truly broke, I felt that I was being used the whole time, really hurt, im still hurt tell now.

Its just she doesn’t really care.

Its my mistake for caring and getting close to ppl, its just we were all worried about her, and what were gonna do and we were living in stress the whole night and we covered it up for us and her.

She can make some or any lame excuse but no, she had to say my name and stab me.

Do u know that by the time I went back home, I was covered in throw up and alcohol.

I was a mess!

Truly the worst day of my life.

It seems that whenever I get close to someone, I get back stabbed, why couldn’t she just take the blame, she did that to her self, why throw me into it, all that I did was being there for here and look what happened…

See, usually when there is alcohol or drugs, I leave but this time, I couldn’t leave her, I had to stay, cause we came together.

I can remember every single word she said ,she was drunk…she looked different, scary so did steven, it scared me to be in that position, to have all that stress and I had to come up with pales because of sarahs dad, and the guys r calling me asking of what to do with her, and..UH

I hate this post, I'll never stop talking, its one of the many thigs that’s gonna take time to heal and not hurt me anymore.

I know one thing, I wont get close to anyone ever again.

The only person that did not hurt me was nancy but were so different now..like im sure were gonna see each other again, but r we gonna be like before.

That was a long post, I know..srry.

Ive got a lot to say though but I cant seem to put it into words, again lol

Ive got a little question if anyone comment, what did I learn from this?

Not to get close to somebody, or just simply don’t be around alcohol?

Don’t sneak around is a good advice but I cant stop ,cause all that I do is wrong.

A friend told me to ditch them cause I'll get hurt in the end, should i?

Comment if u care